


Unattainable

by nowherenew



Series: Dragon Age: Drabbles [1]
Category: Dragon Age
Genre: Angst, Other, Pining, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-14
Updated: 2012-04-14
Packaged: 2017-11-03 15:37:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/383070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nowherenew/pseuds/nowherenew
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Saemus comes to terms with the fact that he can never truly be with Ashaad.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unattainable

It was simple. Simple and gut-wrenching. Ashaad could never be his—not ever. It was ironic, really. Saemus could have pretty much anything his heart desired, if he asked nicely enough or dropped a name or two. Only the person he wanted most in the world would ever be unobtainable. Ashaad didn’t belong to a life that allowed happiness, let alone the kind of companionship Saemus wanted. Though the bliss of the Qun was not unknown to Saemus, he wished more than anything that there was a place in the Qun for love, not just function and duty.

Day and night, Saemus fought within himself. He wanted to dedicate himself to the Qun, to find true purpose and the serenity Ashaad always discussed. His worst fears, however, were that his physical closeness to Ashaad would not allow him to focus on that new life. He hated the life he was born to; he was never "Saemus," always "the viscount's boy." He wanted to leave that life behind and never once look back. He never expected to be trapped at a crossroads. Had Ashaad never met him, Saemus would still be ignorant of the Qun and without an option to live his excruciating life as nobility. Still, the fear that his feelings for Ashaad would dishonor the Qun were too great to simply walk into the Arishok's compound without consequence.

It was years after Ashaad was murdered that Saemus decided to join the Qunari. At last, the boy who had no place was happy, content to fill his role and embrace his new duties. To him, his Qun-dictated duties were as warm and comforting as the man who had first given him enlightenment.


End file.
